OUR SERVICESUnderstandably, many people have reservations about bringing up the topic of end-of -ife decisions.
However, it is often the case that the elder is ready to talk openly.
Before starting a conversation, consider the following:
- What are your own concerns about the conversation? Before the conversation, talk about any fears or concerns with a trusted friend or professional. This will help you feel more prepared and relaxed for the actual conversation.
- Consider the person you’ll be having the conversation with. Do you think their emotions, role in the family, or pride may get in the way of having a productive conversation?
If so, consider asking an objective third party (for example, a doctor, religious leader, or social worker) to lead the conversation. This may permit your friend or family member to talk more comfortably and openly. - Recognize that making end-of-life decisions related to medical care and personal finances may take time and involve more than one discussion. Also, be prepared for a variety of emotions that may come up for everyone involved.
Resources
American Association of Homes and Services for the Aging
Innovations in End-of-Life Care
Online journal features peer-reviewed promising practices in end-of-life care.
National Family Caregivers Association
On Our Terms
Web site based on the Bill Moyers PBS television series about end-of-life issues.
Adult Protective Services
New York City Human Resources Administration
(212) 630-1853